Crank Media Review: The Real Thing

Sometimes its hard to imagine what bouldering was like 20 years ago.  Many of the climbers I interact regularly with weren’t even born yet.  I was ten years old.  Pogs were at thing.  Lets hop in the time machine and take in a classic that’s old enough it was sponsored in part by No Fear.  Remember No Fear? No? You must be one of those people I was talking about in the second sentence.

Where to begin? This is not your typical modern bouldering film, for any number of reasons. Its a full two and a half minutes before any rocks are shown, and a good seven before anything that I’d qualify as proper climbing footage appears. That opening sequence, showing our heroes Ben Moon and Jerry Moffatt in a bitchin’ blue collar industrial montage, sets the tone. This is a film mostly about the people, not the lines. Large portions of this film capture the strife of the every-man climber; getting forced to go sledding when your Fontainbleau road trip gets snowed out, training indoors, the joys of 1-5-9 campusing, and great views into the very different motivations of our protagonists. It also takes time out to show the community that comes in climbing – group meals and singing along as German powerhouse Kurt Albert strums the guitar and displays a better command of English than most of us. This type of footage would have been relegated to the bonus features or the cutting room floor of a modern flick.

No Fear though, there is climbing to be had! The film makes up for a number of false starts with some great old school Font footage.  How old school? I saw crashpads under exactly one problem. The camcorders used are the size of shoeboxes. People smoke nearly constantly. Bleached hair. Sorry, back to climbing related things. As a reminder, its 1996, V15 didn’t exist yet. This film really hinges on Ben Moon chasing the newest super hard line in the forest, Karma.

Behold your King Line

In the end, what are we left with? I’ll file this as the bouldering version of Hard Grit. Undeniably old school. Unapologetically British. A classic that’s worth an hour of your time.

Verdict: Borrow It.

Filmed By: Postive Power Productions Simon Tucker

The Who:
Ben Moon, Jerry Moffatt, Kurt Albert, Sean Myles, Marc Le Menestral,

The Where & What:
Sheffield
-Westside Story
-Breadline
-Ben’s Extension
-Jerry’s Traverse
-Fernhill (Free Solo)
-Ben’s Dyno

Fountainbleau
-La Aero Dynamite
-Hypothese
-Balance
-Carnage Berezina Combo
-Biceps Mou
-Malesherbes Traverse
-Sur Prise
-Carnage
-Le Saux Bacquet
-El Poussah
-Double Dyno
-Douze B
-Alta
-The Piano
-Rubis Sur L’ogle
-Sur Plob De La Vallee De La Mee (OMG a crash pad)
-Charcuterie
-Elephant
-Big Golden
-Karma

-Justin Meserve, keep sit real and brings you the classics.  Update your library and educate yourself!