Crank Media Review: Almost Alpine

Get ready for “the greatest climbing film ever made.”

A film that was so great it was given its own rating.  Rated “A” for Awesome; totally awesome for all ages.  Viewers encouraged to view.  Yes, this is a mocumentary about a one of the last first ascents in the Mid-Atlantic.  Set in West Virginia just a few miles up the road from Seneca Rocks an give us all the great elements of climbing film.  This includes the vision, the training, the process, the summit, and what was learned along the way taking everything to the extreme despite being within walking distance to the car at all times, which we are continuously reminded of throughout the film.  The tongue-in-cheek satire is great and if you have ever seen any other visionary type climbing movie, then it will have you laughing along with the guys on screen.  Outtakes, deleted scenes, ad audio commentary on the line and making of the film makes for well rounded experience.

What makes this film so funny is that each of the characters takes on an archetype of our culture.  Chad is the Tai Chi practicing, poem writing, slack-lining, purist, representing the Dean Potter character (remember, this came out a year before Dean’s death in 2015).  Jeremy is the classic off-the-couch climber just looking to have fun but be comfortable and calls to mind a Cedar Wright type character.  Finally, Jesse, or “Alpine Jesse” reminds me of the Daniel Woods type character that is better than everyone else at one particular thing, but can’t hack it on the new project and instead sets out to find his own king line.  The guys wrote fake reviews from fake magazine about both the film and each other and included them in the film to add to the “authenticity” of the proceedings.

However, there are nuggets of truth in this film.  Chad and Jeremy did officially claim the first ascent of the 7000′ North Fork Mountain Traverse in 2009.  They named it Almost Alpine in reverence to Alpine Jesse and his “passing,” and also chose not to grade it to keep the line “pure.”  It actually clocks in around 5.7-5.8.  These guys did all the filming and editing themselves and funded the film through Kickstarter.  It sees regular viewings at climbing events and celebrates everything fun about climbing in the Mid-Atlantic with features at Old Rag and in the Shenandoah on top of the king line at North Fork Mountain.  I love it because just like last month’s feature, it reminds me of why I climb.  Not because we should be seeking out the best in world, but because we should be exploring everything that is the best in our own back yard and not letting our pride in grade chasing stop us from having fun.

VERDICT
Buy it – Purchase of this film helps to support local climbing in West Virginia.  It is also a great way to get any none climber friends of yours interested in just what the hell you do on weekends.

Filmed By: Big Whup Films

Official Teaser

Availability: Buy It Here

THE WHO (alphabetically)
Chad Heddleston
Jeremy Tooley
Jesse “Alpine Jesse” Von Fange

THE WHAT
Almost Alpine, unrated 

Tylor Streett, has a film that Justin doesn’t have!  It is a thing of beauty.