You know what Jams my Cams?  Climber guilt. Sometimes it’s warranted.  Sometimes its just being neurotic. Maybe its the last stale Easter Peeps I found in a cabinet putting me in touch with my guilt-ridden Catholic roots. More likely its because I’ve caught myself fouling up recently. Here’s a list of things that make climbers feel bad, that might be lost on the general public:

#tickmarks #ClimberGuilt
Out to a boulder, I ran into some nice folks, and in the process of comparing favorite lines, I totally forgot to brush off my tick-marks before walking out with them.  As someone who has helped teach Leave No Trace seminars, and who is a bit neurotic about litter, realizing this 30 minutes into the ride home had me just shy of whipping a U-turn.  Hopefully the rain has removed any trace that I was there by now.

#SkippedCoreDay  #ClimberGuilt
Forget “Leg Day”, core is where its at. We’ve all done it, but you should be ashamed of yourself.

#warmeduponyourproject #ClimberGuilt
Climbing is all about sucking at a higher level. That said, I actively resist showing up at a climb someone is projecting in earnest and using it as a warmup, even if its on my standard rotation. Floating effortlessly up something right after someone falls off after a fight for every other move just seems rude.

#brokeahold #ClimberGuilt
I hate it when the fatty in the group (me) rips a jug loose leaving only a featureless scar. Double guilt for breaking an area classic or test piece.

#kickedyourchalkbag #ClimberGuilt
Yea, chalk is cheap, but it still feels bad to knock over someone else’s chalkbag.  Just as you can’t put a genie back in a bottle, try as you might there’s seemingly no way to get a pile of the whitestuff back in its pouch.  Not the worst thing you can kick….

#kickedmyspotter #ClimberGuilt
I’m a dynamic climber, and sometimes generating or arresting that momentum results in a firm boot to my diligent spotters sternum. Or face. Alternatively, you could be like my dear brother, who in the process of falling never fails to perform a perfect 180 degree spinning karate chop to the side of my neck.  You’d think it was deliberate…… wait a minute…..

#downgradeguy #ClimberGuilt
You know who you are, you Brave and Humble folks. Sometimes this arrives with #foundakneebar. Sometimes it unfairly arrives with #firstfemaleascent. Most often its arrives as symptom of the media’s acceptance of some sort of bizarre ‘one drop rule’. A dozen ascents reported at 5.14d, all it takes is one person to suggest it felt 5.14b to them for a guidebox updating tizzy to start.  Funny it never goes the other way when the first ascentionist is a crazy sandbagging jerk.

So remember kids, stay brave and humble, brush off your tick marks, and do those situps.  What triggers your #ClimberGuilt?  Hit us up on Twitter (@Crank_Climbing) with your additions to this list.

-Justin Meserve has a lot of guilt, but probably because he also the nicest guy you will ever meet at the crag.  Cut him break if he flashes your project or kicks your chalk bag, he means well.